Category Archives: All about me, myself and I

Tattered Souls volume 2 softcover GIVEAWAY!

WIN a softcover copy!

It’s my first, I’m nervous…Tattered Souls Volume 2 anthology features my novelette Misery of Me. Beware: this lit horror collection of dark stories and even darker characters might not be suitable for impressionable youngsters.

The rules are simple:

  1. You MUST follow me on Twitter
  2. You MUST subscribe to my blog
  3. You MUST leave a comment with a valid email address

The lucky winner will be drawn on Monday, October 3rd, at noon, Montreal time. This giveaway is open to international participants – I will pay for shipping and handling of the softcover – and I will check if all rules have been applied.

Good luck everyone:)


Award Season Book Giveaway

Notice the pretty lace and teacup

After the journey to Versatile Blogger came the surprise of Cute Blogger and the creation of Minions of Misery—now, it’s time for the road to One Lovely Blog award. Julie Particka and Lisa Forget are both lovely blogging ladies, and have bestowed upon me this sweet (and sour) nomination.

7 things about myself and 15 lucky nominees: easy-peasy right? Wrong.

  1. I hate to divulge anything about myself, whether it’s personal or not.
  2. I have a super-duper expressive face, which means I can’t hide anything.
  3. I’m mega tall, so it’s quite hard to hide. Period.
  4. My hazel eyes are the mirror to my soul, they reflect hate and love, at the same time, on occasions.
  5. When I get nervous, my tongue gets tied and my hands fly about. Super attractive.
  6. There’s no way I can lie, so don’t even try to make me.
  7. I wish I was elegant but with my clown feet, it’s just not possible.

There, happy? Now you know who to look for in a crowd.

On a brighter note, here are my 15 Lovely Blogger Award nominees who have great blogs you *must* check out!

Jenny

Samantha Young

Blaire Kensley

Robin Ashe

Michelle Birbeck

Hannah Stephenson

Cyndi Tefft

C.W. Lasart

Heather Jacobs

Kyla Holt

J Birch

Ali Cross

April Denton

Stephanie Alexander

Liz Fichera

Misery of Me is in there...

In honor of this blog-awards season and the long autumn nights looming on the horizon, I am giving away a copy of the Tattered Souls Volume 2 anthology, which features my novelette Misery of Me. Beware: this lit horror collection of dark stories and even darker characters might not be suitable for impressionable youngsters.

Here are the giveaway specifics:

  1. You MUST follow me on Twitter
  2. You MUST subscribe to my blog
  3. You MUST leave a comment with a valid email address

The lucky winner will be drawn on Monday, October 3rd, at noon, Montreal time. This giveaway is open to international participants, and I will check if all rules have been applied.

Good luck and have a lovely blog-hopping dayJ


Minions of Misery Award

My Gothsis Angela Addams and I decided to come up with a Goth award of our own (with the help of many Twitter friends, I should say), so here I present to you: the Minions of Misery Award.

The recipient of this distinction shall admit one dark secret, recommend one dark book and suggest one dark film to their readers—and pass on the MoMA to three deserving bloggers who appreciate a good dose of doom and gloom.

As a co-founder of this prestigious gift, here are my answers:

Dark Secret. I don’t want children because I think the world is rotten and people are pigs. I believe I’ll see WWIII before I die and could never rest in peace knowing my mini-me(s?) out there would be fighting for his/her/their/its life. It’s a shame, I love (well-behaved, cute and intelligent) kids and would have been a great mom.

Dark Film. Jane Eyre (1996). So gothic and creepy and moody, a small part of me dies every time I watch it – which is at least twice a year. Charlotte Gainsbourg and William Hurt are such brilliant actors, they bring to life the dark curse that is true love.

Dark Book. White Noise by Dan Delillo. Only recently have I been made aware of this writer’s dark prose and even darker mind. We share a lot, Delillo and I: We believe the world will end soon and there’s nothing we can do about it; whatever we do, we are doomed by those who surround us; and our society is built on crap.

And here are my nominees for the Minions of Misery Award, good friends and great Goths: Colin F Barnes , Imran Siddiq , and Aheïla


Seriously Cute Blogger Award

Sometimes I wonder what I would do without Twitter. True, some people use it to spam with self-promotion, but there are diamonds amongst coal-like Anita Grace Howard, an amazing writer who gave me this award:)

Puppy Club rules are:

1st RULE: You do not talk about Puppy Club.
 
2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about Puppy Club.
 
3rd RULE: You talk about 5 books/films/TV shows you’ve read or watched in the last 12 months.
 
1) Michael Grant’s GONE saga: on an ordinary school day, everyone above 15 years of age poufs out in thin air and a bubble surrounds a small community by the sea. It’s violent, it’s YA, it’s one of the best story I’ve read in a while. 7 books, people – get them.
 
2) Deathly Hallows part 2: This one scene, the one when Snape (beep), I lost it. I’m no crier, I’m not an emotional gal, but Alan Rickman pulled it off. The glare, the hair, the cape, the darkness, I’ve always loved him, but at that moment, I loved him even more.
 
3) Dark Life by Kat Falls. I’ve had ENOUGH of those supposedly dystopian YA novels where writers invent ridiculous and implaussible worlds as an obstacle to love and lust. Which is why this book made me believe in publishing houses again, and it gets better because the sequel Rip Tide is out now.
 

She even looks like me. A little.

4) The Nightmare Before Christmas, by beloved Tim Burton (see my banner? LOVE him!) I watch it at least five times a year and I am no fan of musicals. But the story, the gloomy cuteness, the skeletons and spiders…What a genius, that man is. I still kick myself for having missed his exhibition at the Moma then in Toronto. *self-loathing pout*

 
5) The Fire in Fiction by Donald Maass. Oh, this man knows how to give life to a manuscript, how to develop characters and how to put, well, fire in fiction. Every writers should own this book, he is a master of the craft and gave me hope again:)
 
As this award goes, I have chosen three great gals and two cool dudes who also share a passion for writing:)
 
 
Spread the love, cute bloggers!

Chatting with Colin F. Barnes

Fellow writer and friend Colin F. Barnes stops by to chat about influences, old and new…

AM: I’ve always been attracted to the darker side of things in music, movies and books, and I often try to remember where, how, when and what started it…but I guess it’s always been a part of me since I can’t recall what triggered my passionate affair with the blackest of nights. What was it for you? Do you have a better memory than me?

Dashing industrial dude - circa 1998

Colin Barnes: Like you it’s quite difficult to remember a specific time or event that triggered my interest in the darker things. I think for me personally, it was a culmination of cultural and personal situations. When I was younger, I was a bit of a rebel and was never interested in the popular media of the time, and being a budding artist and dealing with teenage depression I was naturally attracted to darker music, fiction and art. This fascination with all things dark continued to my adult years where I use writing as a medium.

On the topic of media, what were the standout films, bands or books that made the most impact on you.

AM: I remember being scared out of my wits by the original Amityville Horror and ET (still can’t watch either), and then The Shinning (cannot believe my sister made me watch it so young) probably contributed to my vivid nightmares.

I LOVED historical books until I realized they weren’t fictional and got me worried about Humanity. ‘The more I see of the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it,’ Elizabeth Bennet said and I couldn’t agree more. I was engulfed into Anne Rice’s vamps world right after and decided I prefer to spent my time with goths:)

With Robert Smith's self-portrait

Music? Let me shout it out: THE CURE! I was ten the first time I heard Close to me and never looked back. The lyrics, the melodies, the voice! I will never get enough of them, and they are an endless source of inspiration. They opened doors for Bauhaus, Sisters of Mercy, Chameleons, James, Skinny Puppy, and a bunch of others that I still listen to. Old school, I’m not good with new bands.

How about you? Which movies, bands, and books triggered your dark side?

Colin Barnes: I think we have a very similar timeline of influences. For me, the standout horror films that got me hooked were The Thing, Amityville & Nightmare On Elm Street. I was probably 9 or 10 when I was home from school ill and I found some of my parents’ VHS tapes. I started watching The Thing and despite being terrified (of the film and of being caught watching it) I was hooked. The next big memory was when I was about the same age, probably the following summer. I was staying at a friend of my parents place in a really seedy part of London. It was an apartment block and we could hear druggies shooting-up outside the bedroom. The kid of the parents decided it would be a good idea to watch Nightmare on Elm Street – I didn’t sleep that night, and had nightmares for weeks, but I still loved it.

Gothic flair right there

As for fiction, that came quite early. I was bored with the books we were reading at school and my reading ability was more advanced than was expected. So while most people were reading books for children (Roald Dahl) I was reading things like Dune, and The Shining and Carrie. Like you I got into Anne Rice and read everything that she wrote. Which was an odd choice for a teenage boy from Essex! But the goth lifestyle appealed to me greatly. I also really got into H.P Lovecraft and Clark Ashton Smith amongst a bunch of other horror writers.

I had two distinct musical tastes growing up that informed my worldview. The first was metal. Metallica and Black Sabbath specifically. And then the more gothic stuff. I was really into Bauhaus, and later Switchblade Symphony, Anathema, Katatonia etc… I too am pretty old-school when it comes to music, there’s very few modern bands that I like as much as my old favourites.

Krueger knows how to accessorize

AM: People used to think I was so weird as a child: Freddy Krueger was my official crush for several years. Then Jason (so tall and dark and mental) and anyone who wasn’t a preppy and popular. And instead of thinking what’s wrong with me, I’ve celebrated my love for the monster, not the hero.

So how does it transpire in your work? When you write a crazy shit scene, do you put a specific band on? Have you ever been so inspired by a book or a movie that you wrote a story from it?

Colin Barnes: I’ve been there with the whole ‘weird’ thing. When I was in secondary school and we first got computers, I started a project to create a Freddy Krueger computer game. The teachers didn’t approve.

Music is a great catalyst for me. To write certain things I have to be in the right frame of mind. I’m usually gloomy most of the time anyway, but I’ll select certain music for certain scenes. Early Metallica is great for action scenes, and the doomy atmospherics of Anathema or Kyuss, for example, are good for slower paced weird stuff.

As for inspiration, I’m inspired on a daily basis by so many things. I think all my work in some manner comes from something else — it can just be something small. For example, I wrote a flash piece called ‘From Dust to Joy’ because my workplace reminded me of the dusty smell of a library carpet. With regards to other books and stories, I think the thing that inspires me the most is my own arrogance in that I think i can do better. When I read a story I like, I instantly think of things that I think would improve it or make it more weird, dark or extreme – and then that melds with other ideas.

How about you? Is there certain media that moves you to write particular types of stories?

Don't look into my red eyes too long...

AM: I get most of my ideas from drifting thoughts, mostly when I’m reading or watching a film. More often than not, it’s the failed opportunity of a plot that gets my mind going, wanting to rectify the situation in my own words. Especially if a story takes the easy way out, I jump on the chance to mess it all up with my own characters struggling in my own worlds. Much like you, some ideas come from the fact that I want to do it better:)

And of course, I always turn the dark notch to the max, because I really don’t want to see a happy fairytale ending when we’re going to die, some sooner than others. Speaking of dying, what do you want the world to remember you by?

Oh, trouble right there

Colin Barnes: I have a bit of a pessimistic outlook to death and legacy. I just see myself as a pretty inconsequential mote of dust floating about. When I die, I don’t expect anything of me to be remembered. Perhaps a few people might pick up a book or something, but I don’t think there’ll be any lasting memory. As to what I want the world to remember me by — well, I suppose as I don’t believe that I will be remembered in a great detail, I suppose being remembered as the finest writer of my generation would be nice – but then again, I won’t be around to be aware of that acknowledgement so it seems kind of moot. In the end, I guess ‘a good guy’ would be enough.

What about your legacy? Do you write to leave a legacy?

AM: Yes. I want to change the world.

Colin F. Barnes blogs, and I highly recommend his #fridayflash:)


The Versatile Blogger Award

I have been very lucky to meet amazing people on the Kelley Armstrong forum, and two guys from that very special group have given me this award. It’s my first time winning such a thing, so let me gush a little.

Ken McDaniel always answers my military questions with passion and pride; Gareth Wilson amazes me not only for reading so many books but for making me want to read them all too. Their blogs are time well spent.

Now, with my crown and scepter in hand, here are 7 things you probably don’t know about me…

1) During my film studies, which were spread over a 10 year period, from Cegep (a two year pre-university system only found in the province of Quebec) to my Master’s, I didn’t read one single novel, only those part of school requirements. I was immersed in films, making them and watching them. And since then, I’ve become a book junkie for all that time wasted.

2) I’m a vegetarian who wishes to be vegan, but my love of butter, cheese and ice cream prevents me from fulfilling my dream of saving as many animals as possible. I’ve sold my leather handbags and sworn off bacon, but milk products such as those listed above give me one more reason to live. Sorry, cows.

3) I’m a blusher, therefore I redden at cute guys and public comments aimed at me—and I can’t hide because I’m so tall. Such is my world.

4) I Am Earlybird. I eat early and go to bed early. Probably has to do with the fact that my dreams are better than real life. I’ve always been like that, especially in the summer – I love closing my eyes on the lighted sky.

My friend Caroz got starstrucked, which explains the blurry quality...

5) I have this disease called The Backstage Syndrome. The Cure, Nine Inch Nails, Lalala Human Steps have been subject to my trespassing into the green room and have suffered minor attacks. Edouard Lock refused my marriage proposal with a polite bow, Trent Reznor cleverly stayed away from me at the Brixton Academy, but Robert Smith and Simon Gallup lived the Anne Experience as they both—very patiently—talked to me at Curiosa in 2004.

6) I hate flying and must take drugs at take off. I have this fear of being kept in a small-ish space with hundreds of people while having this great big nothing surround us. Yes, I am paradoxal. Could you pass the Xanax, please?

7) I’ve been writing horror stories for a while. I love horror movies, creepy music, gothic bands and scary books—but I faint at the sight of real blood. I’ll never be a vampire but could be the first anorexic zombie, if the apocalypse ever strikes.

This award keeps on giving! My two nominees are…

Anita Grace Howard is a writer with whom I share writing muses. Enjoy her blog, it’s as gorgeous as her writing.

Annie Neugebauer is a writer with an amazing blog, her poems make me envious of her great talent.

Enjoy, ladies!


Seldom

I don’t know why, never really stopped to think about it since I guess the outcome would depress me, but I feel this rush when I see my name in print at the back of an anthology or in a magazine editorial. Pretty much like at the end of my films, where I signed this short moment in time as my own. My words, my worlds.

I first thought of Misery of Me about a year and a half ago. I was reading another vampire book (a little obsession of mine called Let the Right One In by stellar author John Ajvide Lindqvist) when I got this idea for a heroine addict vampire falling for her suicidal blood bank. Catchy, right?

I checked out Duotrope (because who doesn’t, really?) and noticed Cutting Block Press actually wanted horror novelettes – a rare thing – they paid a fair rate, but asked specifically for no vampires… unless something different was explored. Well, I started to write down this story of need and want, of sadness and despair. Added a few dark twists and gloomy turns and sent it to my beta-friend.

Her favorite, by far. Strange, since we’d all ODed on fangs by this point. So after a few tweaks, off to them Texans. Couple months later, I received this email full of praise from the editor himself. Not only did I fall in love with this stranger who liked Misery, but little did I know he would provide me with the best editing experience I’ve ever had. Kind and sometimes heartless, encouraging and sweet and motivating—love at first word.

Does it get better? It does. I get to hold this anthology of amazing stories by creative writers, and my name is printed on its back. It travelled from my mind unto here, something tangible I can touch. I’m so proud of the anthology, so happy to be a part of it. This is how I get paid to write everyday, this feeling right here.


Off day

It’s weird how my writing brain works. Some mornings, I don’t feel like putting a single word down on the page but as soon as I start, I can’t stop: the sentences flow, the ideas keep getting better, the story progresses and I even find some fantastic twists. And then, there’re mornings where I know where the story is heading, and I’m so excited to start—until I stare at a blank page and the words are stuck in my head. Won’t come out, or when they do, well… less than stellar, let’s say.

So what to do? Some think you have to bust through and keep writing (even if it might be shit) and others say to leave it be and come back another time: in ten minutes, ten hours, ten days. But then, what about the guilt? You know, when you keep thinking so many people dream about being able to write all day, I get to do it but here I am, stuck. Ten or twelve hours of writing time lost forever because of some stupid little bug in my head.

What I think? We all deserve an off day and shouldn’t feel bad about taking a break. I often find that if I get out of the house and go somewhere busy, I can think easier about why my story isn’t taking the shape I want it to and brainstorm better surrounded by strangers. No, not WITH them, but hearing different accents, seeing different faces and having a change of scenery always brings new life into my writing. Oh, and my brain thanks me for it the next time I pick up a pen.

 

This post was written at the Thai Express restaurant while developing Evoly, my MC for Land in Abyss.